It’s cyber Monday, and Black Friday has passed, so it’s officially The Holiday Season (should be a flourish and some glitter that goes with that phrase). My husband and kids have been asking, “Mom, what do you want for Christmas?”. I don’t know what to say, so I joke – “hair” I answer. I don’t know why I’m having trouble coming up with my list this year. I guess I could figure out some more things that I could use – we need a new griddle, and my car is always a mess, so I guess a car detail gift certificate would be nice. But, after the year I’ve had, I can’t help thinking that the things I really want don’t fit under the Christmas tree.
The truth is that most working moms would come up with a very different list of what they really want. Here’s my real list:
Working Mom’s Wish List
- A Maid. Not a cleaning lady, I have that. I want a maid – like Alice on The Brady Bunch. Someone who comes in the morning with the groceries for the days meal. Laundry is washed, folded, and put in my children’s dressers in bedrooms where the sheets were changed regularly and the beds were always made. Light housekeeping is done. The evening meal is made, then cleaned up, and it all repeats the next day. What exactly did Carol Brady do all day? It seems like Alice did all the work around that house.
- The Laundry Fairy. Given that I’m not likely to get #1 above, I’d settle for a laundry fairy. This fairy would empty every laundry basket in my house – carefully folding and putting clothes away, as well as sorting through them all and putting all the straggling summer clothes with the correct store for next year (if they’ll fit – this would be magically discerned!), and the clothes that are too small in the hand-me-down storage, as well as the “donate” and “trash” sorting. Once all the current baskets were empty, then the fairy would do all the laundry in the hampers, the “house” pile of towels and sheets, and clean out the laundry room. A subsequent weekly visit from the laundry fairy would be all I need . . .
- To be on the same page as my husband when it comes to parenting. Ok, so we are not polar opposites or anything, and I think every couple is not going to agree 100% with parenting, but I think there is such a thing as “parenting” – the work involved with homework and bedtimes and sibling fighting, and discipline– while my husband just thinks all these things should magically happen. His answer if the kids don’t do as they are told is to yell at the kids Then yell louder. Sigh. You see where this is going? I get the lion’s share of the parenting work, and I sure would like a break. Or at least someone who supports it . . .
- To have kids that clean up their messes at least 50% of the time without asking. This would decrease my own cleaning load by 50%, so I think that would be a deal. Plus it has the added benefit of 50% less nagging. I hate to nag. I hate the sound of my own voice screeching and pleading. I’m sure they hate it more.
- Liposuction. Hey, as long as we are in fantasy land, I’ll admit that the idea of having the fat sucked off of me instead of having to workout 7x a week for 1+ hours a day and eat like a super model in order to attain my desired figure would be *the best gift ever*.
- To become more like DH when it comes to my needs or time off. My husband has absolutely no problem taking a full weekend day to go fishing. He leaves early in the morning and doesn’t come home until after dinner. He doesn’t worry about the chores that aren’t getting done. He doesn’t worry about kids getting to activities. He doesn’t worry about feeding them. Or cleaning up after them. He is gone, gone, gone. And this happens 2-5 times a month! I think I need to get me some hobby where I’m gone for whole days at a time and not have a care or feel guilty at all.
So, there it is, this working mom’s fantasy wish list. If I end up getting any of these things for Christmas, I’ll be sure to let you know! I hope your wildest Christmas wishes come true.
